Dec. 19th, 2010

Like Josh

Dec. 19th, 2010 10:24 am
geoholms: (Steampunk Bearcat)
I wanna be like Josh Groben.

No, that does not mean I want to start singing or have millions of fans ranging from the ages of 10-100. I don't want to have that curly mob or hair or that winning smile or whatever it is that causes other people to be like Josh Groben.

It all depends if you have seen Josh Groben perform live. I did, about four years or so back. I was up in the balcony above, squinting for details. I accepted the music, but it didn't really catch me. He does good music, but I've yet to ever be lured to get an album or song of his. Just not my thing. The thing that struck me about the performance is how much of a geek he was. I don't think I have ever seen someone so utterly geeky on stage before.

He is geeky about the songs he sings, his horrible dance moves, and classic instruments. But in the way I'm using geek here, is I mean in all ways it looked like he legitimately enjoyed what he was doing. He loves being able to do what he does and bringing a little dash of joy to those around him.

I suppose that is something I want to strive for.

I occasionally let my mind wander and look at the talent of others, fawn over it, wonder if I shall ever have that incredible skill, be able to move limbs that don't quite exist in reality to be pushed into poses that do, to be able to draw fuzz and the muscles underneath and to get those maws to open into grand expressions. I go through these moments, almost requesting company of the green-eyed monster, trying to get her to let me say something utterly stupid in public.

I need to be geeky about what I do. I need to legitimately enjoy what I am doing and try to lend a bit of myself to amuse others. I want to be able to present myself without fear and just have fun with what I do. I want to improve in time and just make something that is myself. I want to be like Josh Groben, doing an awkward little dance on stage, for the murmuring snickers of an audience beyond in the shadows.

I want to be me and whatever that might entail. I want to be geeky.

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Geo Holms

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